I confess that no one has ever put it quite that bluntly as my title, but I’ve heard a number of softer versions of it over the years. It usually sounds something like this:
I’ve wrestled with this scenario with some of you already. In one or two churches I preached my beloved “Coming and Going of Pastors” sermon or sermons, from I Corinthians 3, twice, once before you called your new pastor, and secondly, a little sheepishly, after you called him and had the “match” turn out so badly that it left you doubting God and wanting a refund of my honorarium.
The easy way out of this would be to simply “play the mystery card,” which means that I’d say that “it’s all a mystery” and then expect you to be willing to leave it at that.
But I think we can do a little better than that.
Over the next several weeks I’m going to unpack nine (or more) possible answers to the question: “Why did our good God send us a bad pastor?” When I’m all done and the ink is dry, there still will be an inexplicable and deeply disturbing element of mystery. But some of you, at least, will be helped, so, with God’s good help, here goes:
- Perhaps it “just happened.” I had this put to me recently:
“Our stove just quit working, our snow-thrower is broken and our car’s exhaust system just went bad. God wasn’t ‘in’ these things and maybe He wasn’t involved in our pastor-disaster either.”
Very simply: I don’t buy it. The actual teaching of Scripture is that the one who sees every sparrow fall to ground (Matthew 6:26, 10:29-31), the one who is “behind” every icy blast of every snowstorm (Psalm 147:16-18) did not let your pastor-disaster “just happen.” At the very least He knew what would happen, He allowed what would happen and He cared about you as it happened.
Not every church teaches the full-fledged Biblical truth on this subject, but every church should teach it. I’ll probably mention our Old Testament friend Job again before I’m through with these posts, but let’s bring him onto the stage right now.
Job and his friends all knew enough to “blame God” for Job’s suffering. God was totally and intimately aware of every moment of Job’s physical, mental and emotional torment. He, in fact, “pre-authorized” it. And He loved him, which implies, in and of itself, that He was involved with the details of his life.
So let’s dispose of this explanation right away. Your painful pastoral experience didn’t just happen; in some way, shape or form, God was in on it.
- Maybe it was because you didn’t do your “due diligence.”
I can’t imagine a church decision which is worthy of more heartfelt prayer than the decision to call a new pastor. Paraphrasing my friend Ken Moberg’s great little book on the congregational church’s pastoral call process, HELP! We Just Lost Our Pastor, when the pastoral search committee gathers on the first Tuesday night of the month for their meeting, prayer is not the precursor to the main business of the evening; prayer is the main business of the evening.
Sadly, I’ve seen pastor search committees which acted like they needed the new pastor on board so that someone in the church would know how to lead in prayer. If we need a Biblical model, please check out Acts 13:1-4, where the leaders (plural) of a congregation prayed with fasting – not feasting – for God’s leadership. They got what they prayed for: the Holy Spirit told them what to do and named the major players. Paul and Barnabas hit the road as the Church’s first missionaries and the rest is history.
Think with me for a moment about the scenario of a church endeavoring to call a new senior/solo/lead pastor, from outside the congregation and – usually – outside the area. He will be expected to arrive on the scene and become the primary teacher, the primary leader and the primary caregiver, without previously being a part of the community itself, or the church’s culture, or the church’s leadership team.
I’m not saying that this is wrong; I’m saying that it’s precarious, dangerous and maybe even a little presumptuous. We’re asking so much from the “search process” (as it is customarily done) that it’s no wonder that our “due diligence” so often falls short of the mark.
When I recently confessed to a colleague that I had coached seven pastor search committees and only four of the churches were happy with the pastors they eventually called, my un-surprised friend replied: “That’s about par for the course.”
- Maybe he was a good man who was a terrible match for your church.
This is an easier scenario to write about than most of these on my list because it doesn’t imply any significant wrongdoing on anyone’s part. Let’s put it like this:
I once was asked to do some counseling with an unmarried couple who were having serious trouble with their relationship. The female began by reciting all the terrible things she had learned about her boyfriend. When she finished, he pretty much just agreed with her assessment. Then it was his turn, as he proceeded to pour out a long and detailed list of his girlfriend’s faults. When he was finally done, she, in turn, agreed with his description of her. Again…no argument.
I told them that since they weren’t married and they hadn’t created any children together, they should simply get as far away from each other as possible, as quickly as possible.
I also encouraged them to give their lives to the one who could transform their personalities.As far as I know, they didn’t trust Jesus, but they did split up quickly, as I had counseled.
I’ve seen pastor/church matchups that have been almost that bad. I’m not saying that the churches were awful or that the pastors were awful, I’m merely saying that the matchups were awful and the dysfunction and dissatisfaction led to some tense months until the pastor resigned and relocated.
In a case that rivaled the relationship counseling story above in its intensity, I consulted with a good and likeable young pastor who wanted to be a free-wheeling evangelist but had somehow been called to a solo pastor position with a congregation which wanted a study-bound, home-visiting, traditionalist, caregiver. They were all good people and so mismatched that I was left in awe and wonder over how the match had happened.
Would that we could end such awkward mis-arrangements with grace, patience and understanding, or, better yet, that we wouldn’t let them happen in the first place.
In defense of pastors, I’ve observed that many newer ones in particular, don’t know themselves and their gifts and their passions well enough to say “No, I don’t belong with your church.”
In defense of churches, I’ve observed that, similarly, many don’t have a clear idea of what they genuinely want and need in a pastor (until after they’ve called one).
In defense of both pastors and churches, pastors without churches sometimes get desperate and deceive themselves about themselves or potential positions, and churches without pastors for considerable periods of time deceive themselves about the suitability of their eager young candidates.
If you haven’t been helped yet, please revisit this blog for the next few weeks.
