There’s something a little crazy about family love. My wife Donna and I listen to podcasts about missing people. No matter how far apart the family members were living when the individual disappeared, no matter how many difficulties they had had in getting along during their formative years, no matter how many family challenges they had faced, the crazy family love typically continues unabated, driving siblings, parents and children to extraordinary search efforts.
God is looking for crazy, extraordinary, family love in churches. It is supposed to be our mark (John 13:34,35, 17:20-26), our brand, our most obvious distinguishing characteristic.
The rest of this post is going to be a little unusual. I’m simply going to give you a “sampler” of the teachings and pleadings of the New Testament writers on the subject of what should be our crazy, family love. Again, this is just a taste of what God’s Word has to say on the subject; for the full meal, take a topical Bible or a concordance, turn to the word “love” and just start reading.
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34 A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. 35 By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another. John 13:34,35
Note: Loving each other isn’t the new commandment (Leviticus 19:18). Loving each other in the sacrificial way in which Jesus loved us is the new commandment. It is supposed to be unmistakably evident to the unbelievers around us.
9 Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good. 10 Be devoted to one another in love. Honor one another above yourselves. Romans 12:9-10
Note: To honor means “to treat as very special.” Do you treat each believer in your church as somebody special?
14 Do everything in love. I Corinthians 16:14
Note: I define this kind of love as “my commitment to God’s best for your life.” You might want to check out what Paul says about loving confrontation in Ephesians 4, especially vs. 29. Every word you say should be for the benefit of your brother, not to “get something off your chest.” See also Ephesians 5:1-2 about living “a life of love” which must mean a life lived for God and for others, not for yourself.
9 And this is my prayer: that your love may abound more and more in knowledge and depth of insight… Philippians 1:9
5 The goal of this command is love, which comes from a pure heart and a good conscience and a sincere faith. I Timothy 1:5
5 For this very reason, make every effort to add to your faith goodness; and to goodness, knowledge; 6 and to knowledge, self-control; and to self-control, perseverance; and to perseverance, godliness; 7 and to godliness, mutual affection; and to mutual affection, love. II Peter 1:5-7
13And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love. I Corinthians 13:13
12 Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. 13 Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.14 And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity. Colossians 3:12-14
Notice that several of these passages describe love as being the epitome of the Christian virtues: To mature in Christ is to become mature in love.
22 Now that you have purified yourselves by obeying the truth so that you have sincere love for each other, love one another deeply, from the heart. I Peter 1:22
8 Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins. I Peter 4:8
Notice that love demands and leads to forgiveness.
24 And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds, 25 not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching. Hebrews 10:24,25
Note: Every Christian has the ministry of “going to church” to help others to become better at loving. You have a class to teach this Sunday on the subject of love. Are you ready?
11 For this is the message you heard from the beginning: We should love one another. 12 Do not be like Cain, who belonged to the evil one and murdered his brother. And why did he murder him? Because his own actions were evil and his brother’s were righteous. 13 Do not be surprised, my brothers and sisters,[a] if the world hates you. 14 We know that we have passed from death to life, because we love each other. Anyone who does not love remains in death.15 Anyone who hates a brother or sister is a murderer, and you know that no murderer has eternal life residing in him.
16 This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers and sisters. 17 If anyone has material possessions and sees a brother or sister in need but has no pity on them, how can the love of God be in that person?18 Dear children, let us not love with words or speech but with actions and in truth. I John 3:11-18
Note: We’ve come full circle. We are to love the brethren in the sacrificial way in which Christ loved and loves us. It demands honor, forgiveness, affection, compassion, gracious words and sacrificial giving.
QUESTIONS FOR DISCUSSION:
- So where do gossip and insulting each other at congregational meetings fit into this picture?
- What are the alternative, God-approved courses of action for those who feel like gossiping about or insulting each other?
- Do you think that evangelical Christians in America are best known for their love?Is love our mark, our brand?
- In our church, are we more apt to measure Christian maturing by “lives of love” or by Bible knowledge?
- How can “ordinary” church members actually practice Hebrews 10:24,25 on a Sunday morning?